After spending the day reading, I decided to make it a low key night: stayed in, cooked and watched a movie. My netflix queue was topped off recently, refreshed with award-winning blockbusters, independents, foreign films, and classics.
Two weeks ago, I was blown away by the Kirk Douglas in the title-role of Spartacus. There are some really questionable scenes in the movie, but looking back at the time when it was released, I can imagine that it was ground-breaking --- to say the least. Last week I finally saw The Curious Case of Benjamin Button, which tapped into some of my feelings about the certainty of death. Not sure if it is my having battled cancer or other recent emotional events, but I was locked in for 3 hours straight.
Tonight's film was the Diving Bell and the Butterfly. I knew nothing about this movie prior to pushing play tonight. Within a few minutes, I find out that it is a story about a man trapped in his own body after a stroke. The script, story-telling, cinematography, casting, score and everything else were superb. It's not often that in the middle of a movie, you think "I may have a new one to add to my favorite all-time films".
A lot of this ties back more to my general feeling right now. Assumptions and expectations only bring pain, and I have had way too much happen recently to not acknowledge that. Letting go is key. I don't mean that to mean accepting mediocrity and living in the absence of effort or passion. I think it is more about the disposition of self prior to action, rather than after or during.
I once wrote an email encouraging people to never let go the child-like sense of wonder and awe. That is the crux of what I am restating here. Let go of being an adult.
